You and Your Personality

A nine year old girl and her mother showed up in my office recently. The mother wanted me to see the little kid for hypnotherapy sessions. Now the problem is I no longer treat people one on one simply because it takes a lot of time and energy on my part. For hypnosis related purposes I conduct a workshop once in a while where I can help more people with less time. So my secretary told the woman that I no longer see clients personally but the woman refused to go away. She said that she is desperate and her little kid needs my help.

My secretary called me up and asked me what she should do? Well as you can imagine, even in this material world where time is money, I still cannot say no to a little kid who needs my help. And hearing what her problem was, I could tell traditional forms of therapy probably wouldn't help. I gave her the first appointment the next afternoon.

So here is the story of the girl:

For the last 2 years her problem is she is absolutely terrified to go to school. The moment she sees her school, she gets the feeling that her mum and dad would die! So ever since she has had this problem, she couldn't stay in school more than 3-4 hours on the days she does manage to go and on most days she's simply too afraid to let go of her mum and therefore cannot go to school. She gets so afraid that she actually throws up just at the sight of her school.

I checked her grade reports and turns out she is one of the best students of her class and all her teachers have very positive comments about her. I asked her mother if they have any idea why this might be happening and they had no clue. Her mother also had another stack of papers for me to check: her doctor's prescriptions!

Turns out she has been treated by some very senior psychiatrists and therapists and they have all prescribed some medicines for her. And even though her mother gave her some of  the medicines for a while, she soon figured that a little child like this shouldn't be on medicine and she discontinued (thankfully). The medicines were mostly nerve relaxing sedatives. To cut a long story short, one of the teachers of the little girl is also my student and she recommended the mother to come and see me.

In hypnotherapy we have a thing called age regression. What that means is under hypnosis we take the client straight back into the time when the problem started. We do it for two reasons, first to find out what the source of the problem is (under hypnosis they don't have a conscious choice to hide the real issue, which is always a possibility), and second to prepare the client (who is at a regressed state) to face the traumatizing event, whatever it is.

So on our first session, I regressed the little girl and she went straight back to when she was 6 years and a few months old and she was on a vacation in Toronto, Canada. Turns out they went to a theme park where her father and herself, while going from this ride to that ride, unknowingly got up on a roller coaster. Now the little girl had no idea about a roller coaster and she took the first ride of her life without even knowing what was going to happen.

Naturally it was a terrifying event for her with everyone screaming all around and the world going upside down and going up on the top and then falling all the way down... The feeling that she got was that her father and herself were both going to die. Anyway the ride eventually ended and while the little kid was thoroughly shaken, she was not physically harmed or anything. Then something else happened...

On the same day later in the evening, a call from her school headmistress came in. Apparently they were late by a couple of weeks and the school had already started (later I found out from her mother that the headmistress was a very strict woman and all students were extremely afraid of her). Not knowing what happened earlier with the kid (although I doubt even if she knew that would make any difference) the headmistress lady screamed on the phone both to the little kid and her parents regarding there would be serious consequences for being absent during school time.

A couple of days later they flew back home and the problem had started. The little kid became horrified at the sight of her school ever since.

Now as a Hypnotherapist, even if I know exactly what went wrong, I did not need to know. One of great power of hypnosis as a tool is that once in a trance state, if you follow the simple rules, it almost works like magic; you don't need to understand all the why's and how's. Anyway, because there is a reason I'm telling you this story, I'll tell you what happened that made her so afraid of going to the school ever since.

Our mind is capable of handling trauma of enormous extent if it is prepared for it. But unprepared, even small things can make a deep impact. Now what happened with the little kid is that she was not prepared at all for something like a roller coaster at age 6 and I'm sure you'll agree that a surprise like that can be pretty terrifying even for adults. So she mistakenly experienced in her mind what we call a near death experience (remember what is real in the mind, is real in reality). And she also felt that her dad was going to die as well. Now alone this might have turned into a life time of roller coaster or height phobia, but the next event changed things.

In the same evening she experienced another fearful event of her headmistress screaming on the phone and telling that there were going to be "serious consequences". In her little mind, there happened a thing that we call compounding and she somehow connected the two events together. So now we have her seemingly "unrelated" feeling that her parents are going to die if she goes to school.

Many of us are going through life with many of these similar kinds of unknown triggers that are seemingly "unrelated". Have you ever seen someone suddenly blow of his top and walk out of the room for something that is not serious at all? Later at the privacy of his mind he asks himself "why did I do that?" but he unable to tell. Have you ever gotten angry over something and vented off to someone totally innocent and later felt guilty? Have you ever gained weight for just snacking over and over? Were you just helpless at the sight of some food or drink? Have you ever smoked or drank just to drown your problem?

The answer to the questions above is yes most of us have experienced at least some of these "out of control" moments. And a lot of us regularly deal with these feelings. Sometimes we go to doctors and psychiatrists when these feelings go out of hand and we ask for help. Typically what happens? We are given some medicines to take away the feelings or go for many therapy sessions where we go and talk about things and sometimes it works. But as we all know most times it doesn't. Take for example the little kid in the story above. What would have happened if her mother would have given into all those prescriptions of the learned authorities? This kid would have known from this very young age that she needs to be on medicines and she needs regular help. How do you think that would have affected her personality?

The problem is, she is not alone. Everyday all around the world thousands of people are diagnosed with "mental problems" such as this and are prescribed medicines. Most of these medicines are nerve relaxing agents that de-press the "bad feeling". What we don't stop to ask ourselves is that if we have legs to walk with, eyes to see, nose to smell with, why do we have such powerful things called feelings that can totally take control of our lives? If you ask one of these diagnosing authorities this simple question "why do we have feelings in the first place?", they will give you a look that translates as: Are you nuts?

One of the key things that we are taught when we learn hypnotherapy professionally is that our feelings and emotions are neither good nor bad, they are just messages. They are messages for us to direct our life in the right way. And there is a reason why they are there. And that reason is to help us move in the right direction. Every feeling has a specific message. Anger, sadness, fear, guilt, frustration, depression etc are all trying to deliver very specific messages. And because most of our doctors and psychologists have absolutely no clue about what these messages are, we are regularly given the solution to just "get rid of the feeling" with medicines. This is equivalent of chopping your hands off when you have a fractured bone.

On your journey into the world of the unseen, where you will learn how to redefine your reality, the very first step will be to learn about the meanings of all your feelings and emotions. Why you have it and what is their purpose. You will learn how to completely free yourself once and for all from all the emotional baggage that you may have been carrying for so long. You will be given specific tools to deal with each and every emotion and feeling that you have.

Once you have mastered dealing with your emotions effectively, you will be taught the next big thing and that is how your physical body can affect your mental state and how to bring yourself in the state where you can perform optimally. Unfortunately most of us don't even know what an optimum state is. What we are really capable of. Have you ever seen some people with boundless energy who are just always in a good mood? Well follow what you learn here and you can have that too in no time. And once you are done with this, you will learn many other personality transforming concepts such as limits of achievement, the invisible placard etc.

So back to the beginning! Have you done your exercises from yesterday? If you haven't, and if your excuse is that you were too busy, then I would like to remind you that the only reason you have subscribed to this E-Course is that you want more power over your life and learn how to redefine your reality. The "events" in life like work, business, shopping, watching television are all secondary to the work we are going to be doing, which deals with the "quality" of your life and how much power you have, and not the events that just sucks away your 24 hours in it. So start claiming your life back. Start focusing more on the quality of your life and not on the events. Read the last sentence again. And read that again until you "get it".

Day 2: Exercise 1: Consciously notice all the feelings that you experience throughout the day and ask yourself why are you having it. What is it trying to tell you? For example, if you feel angry, ask yourself why are you feeling angry and what is your mind asking you to do? What is the reason behind this feeling you are having? Whenever you have a strong enough feeling, ask yourself these questions.

Day 2: Exercise 2: Write down on a piece of paper your first mission statement -

"In the face of difficulty, uncertainty and conflicting sensory information, I recognize more and more the magical, infinite, nurturing reality that I live in. I understand now that I am not the events of my life. And even if it may feel otherwise, I recognize that I am that which transcends all the borders of life and death; I am my consciousness and I have the power to create. I further recognize that living within this magical reality, as a Creation among my Creations, is the ultimate adventure. And in this loving and magical reality my thoughts create matter, dreams come true and love conquers all. Therefore, as I recognize more and more the power that is within me, I pledge to use them for love, light and the benefit of all. Finally, I promise to myself to love and be happy, at all costs, no matter what, with compassion and kindness for All. So be it."

Once you have written it down or printed it out, hang it somewhere where you can regularly see it and read it twice a day. It doesn't matter if you don't understand the full depth of it or are confused on some parts, your subconscious knows what we are talking about and it will act accordingly.

Now... before we end this today, here is something for you:

Recently I was featured on Radio KSCO, California. I think you will enjoy the interview:

http://www.redefineyourreality.com/mp3/Shafin-Interview-RadioKSCO-SantaCruz-CA.mp3

(This is raw recording done on my end, so please expect poor recording quality and some noise.)

Tomorrow we will talk about something very interesting... YOU and Your Belief System! Stay tuned! We got lotsa fun stuff coming up :-)

Now go make the world a little better today.

Shafin
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